Dear Allah, I know not what your plans are for
me. Sometimes I feel like giving up. Everytime when things seems to be
going alright then suddenly every thing turns upside down again. Its now
been 15 years that I have been in and out of jobs and i am now without
work. I am jobless, without much money. I have 3 children to and a wife
who depends on me for support and in turn I depend on you but help seems
to be a long way. I don’t know how much longer I can linger on this
hope that I have. I have not been paid my last salary, nor reimbursed
for my travelling claims. I;ve been cheated too many times that I’m now
beginning to question the fairness of this world. Isn’t there any
justice? Or am I being too nice of a person that people take advantage
of me. I lost my home to a conman, I partnered in a business with a
friend but at the end I was not paid my share of the profits although my
partner lives a luxurious lifestyle. After countless of rejected job
interviews, I managed to get a job 7 months ago but even then I’ve not
been paid my last month’s salary nor been reimbursed of my travelling
claims. Years ago my wife cheated on me but I took her back and even
forgave her, Even my inheritance was signed away to my youngest sibling
by my late father. My house, my car, my business ideas … There’s too
many to list. The question is … Why? Am I that bad of a person that I do
not deserve your help? I’ve never cheated anyone. I have never turned
down anyone who seek financial help from me even when I myself
have very little for my own. I’ve never disclosed my situation, my
difficulties to anyone. I only tell them to you O Allah .. Only you
know, but I’m beginning to fade into despair. I’m beginning to lose
hope. I’m now in my fifties. and without work but with mouths to feed.
Even in life, things have been very difficult for me … What more in the
Hereafter. I sometimes wish I was never born then I would not have to go
through the trial & tribulation of both this world and the
hereafter. I look forward to sleep each night because only in my dreams,
when I am not awake … can I escape form my despair and
dissapointment. Please Oh Allah … I am not asking much … I’m not asking
to be millionaire, I;m not asking to be rich .. I am the sort of person
who likes to borrow money from anyone and that would be the last thing I
would do even when I am without any money. I’m just asking that you
protect me from liars, cheaters conmen and thieves …. and that I find a
stable job that would provide me with a steady income have enough to
take care of my family.(Somehow or rather in my heart I do not see that
coming … And I am clueless as to why and I am beginning to wonder why
the conmen, the white collared criminals, the well dressed liars and
thieves seems to get away with it … O Allah please help me keep my faith
in you)
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